In an exclusive interview, the architect of the Tower of Babel has cast doubt on the recent claim by David Willetts, the universities and science minister, that by the year 2050 people will no longer be talking about the fiasco of his student loans policy.

Speaking to our reporter Keith Ponting (30), the Babel architect said that he had always hoped that the failure of his tower to reach heaven would soon be forgotten, in much the same way that Mr Willetts now hoped that the failure of his student loans edifice to save a single penny for the public purse would fade into history. But sadly, the architect noted, his tower still served as a monument to human folly several thousand years after its erection.

(Mr Willetts is expected to leave his post in the near future.)

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Watch out – here comes the QAA!

“Let’s be fair to the QAA.”

That was how Jamie Targett, our Director of Corporate Affairs, reacted to concerns about alleged irregularities at the for-profit London School of Science and Technology, many of whose students claim support from the public-backed Student Loans Company.

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Mr Targett admitted that just eight months ago the Quality Assurance Agency had visited the LSST for a second time and again given a clean bill of health to an institution that was recently alleged by a newspaper to be misusing public funds.

This might suggest to a hostile critic that these QAA inspections had been less than adequate. “But remember,” said Mr Targett, “eight months is a long time in quality assurance. An institution can easily go off the rails in such an extended period.”

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But he was happy to report that the ball was now firmly back in the QAA’s court after the announcement that its inspectors would be popping back to the LSST this very autumn for yet another inspection.

“That prospect”, said Mr Targett, “will really have the LSST directors quaking in their boots.”

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Unpopular? There’s the door

Our Head of Curriculum Development, Janet Fluellen, has expressed her “admiration” for the “Snowden method” of teaching evaluation.

In this method, named after the vice-chancellor of the University of Surrey, Sir Christopher Snowden, lecturers are expected to achieve at least 3.8 points out of 5 in module evaluation questionnaires completed by their students. If they fall short, they will be asked to attend an “informal capability meeting” that, according to the union, can eventually lead to dismissal.

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Ms Fluellen said that she was “frankly amazed” to learn that some academics at Surrey had questioned the fairness of the scheme because it discriminated against those who were teaching unpopular courses. “Why on earth”, she asked, “is anyone at a modern university going forward teaching subjects that have not already been pre-tested for student popularity?”

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Thought for the week

(contributed by Jennifer Doubleday, Head of Personal Development)

Please note that finals marking pairs who are attending this week’s relationship counselling session should be accompanied by their disputed scripts.

lolsoc@dircon.co.uk